Thursday, December 31, 2009

It’s time folks….

Fat is something I no longer want to be but……..don’t like that but though……..I find it darn near impossible with daycare from 5:00 in the morning until 6:00 at night to exercise or have energy to exercise in the evening. I have to fix 3 meals a day and 2 snacks also and though I try to make most of all of this really good for them there are days treats are so nice and me having no will power I can’t fix and not eat. We live in Minnesota where right now the snow is over 2’ deep and it’s –9* with a wind-chill of –15*. It’s not like even safely I could go out for a walk. I don’t own a treadmill, I don’t own any real exercise equipment other then two 3 lb dumbbells. There’s no way I can afford our Emporium of Heath places but I am determined this time to make this work. I have to… there are a couple reasons, health of course is a big one and the other, my son graduates this coming spring and we are having an open house and I would love to look nice instead of just a fat mama. As you can see I’m not impressed with myself at all. I’ve been to the doctor and he says lose some weight but doesn’t offer anything except the words which really is a good thing because I’m healthy enough to get to work. I do have to be careful with my lower back because of working in a nursing home for 12 years and the multiple injuries have made some permanent damage but if my trunk was stronger my back would be stronger and exercising would be easier. A round robin thing.

So this is my plan………and with your help I bet I can do it.

I want to weigh 180 in 6 months, that means …….oh boy here it goes……..I need to lose……..oh I can’t tell you…….not yet. Maybe in a little bit. I don’t want to buy lots of new clothes or anything, I just want to wear things that don’t look painted on. I want to move and not breath hard or at least only have to breath hard when I’m busy.

Help please. I need input…I need ideas…I need ideas that don’t cost anything or very little. I promise to keep you posted on how this goes. I was going to write…if it goes…but that’s not the right frame of mind I want, I want I will post WHEN I lose each 5 lbs. I will be weighing myself, measuring myself this coming weekend when the house is quiet and I’m alone. I will keep a paper journal of my eating habits and exercising.

I have one blogger that has given me some cool ideas and is even sending me a exercise DVD, check out her blog at Sarah . She has her hands full with her family but she’s able to do it. Kari is doing the same thing, slimming down so nicely.

Can I do this, oh please can I? I sure do hope so….really truly hope so. I have to check out the bible and find some verses to go with all this doubt and worry and make it all into something really positive. I want to do this. I have my doubt since I’ve done this way to many times to count. It’s not a huge goal I’m setting, it’s something I should be able to do.

I am posting this post on my regular blog but think I’ll start up a new one so I can keep this part separate from the rest. I think, what do you think? I’m at a loss about that….really a loss about lots of stuff.

Have you every been scared to try something just thinking it won’t work out but you really want it too? That’s me, I want to so badly but can I. I have not an ounce of will power, not an ounce of restraint when it comes to food. My most favorite thing to do is eat. I don’t mean gorge myself, I just mean eat. Nothing fancy, nothing expensive just meals with family, friends, kids…not to much alone though.

Okay, I’ll post this…I’m scared but I will. Will you help me do this? I have a feeling you will. Do tell me your thoughts about a separate post or the same one. I love sharing with you so you tell me and that’s what I’ll do.

January 4th will be my starting day, June 6th will be the day I would love to weigh 180.

Pray for me, send me verses that work with this and with your help, the Lords help I can do this, right?